I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
