dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
