Don't you send me to vm
People with herpes should wear stickers.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Randomize
