U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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