Texts From Last Night

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  (281): View more from Texas

  the condom got lost in my hair

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  (281): the condom got lost in my hair http://tfl.nu/z469
  Replies (6) Good night (624) Bad night (3258)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.

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  (512): We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment. http://tfl.nu/imr3
  Replies (43) Good night (1751) Bad night (5592)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.

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  (440): We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate. http://tfl.nu/v1r2
  Replies (9) Good night (1683) Bad night (4361)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.

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  (207): I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life. http://tfl.nu/g4gg
  Replies (35) Good night (2721) Bad night (3735)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.

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  (847): you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after. http://tfl.nu/68kq
  Replies (10) Good night (1326) Bad night (4874)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom

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  (605): the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom http://tfl.nu/jd2y
  Replies (6) Good night (714) Bad night (2205)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.

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  (513): I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote. (513): I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now. http://tfl.nu/2ikr
  Replies (17) Good night (788) Bad night (1680)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life

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  (219): googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life http://tfl.nu/fhns
  Replies (2) Good night (587) Bad night (1249)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.

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  (248): Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real. http://tfl.nu/avlt
  Replies (15) Good night (2580) Bad night (693)
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  (650): View more from California

  He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.

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  (650): He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse. http://tfl.nu/0nh4
  Replies (1) Good night (893) Bad night (419)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time

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  (860): It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time http://tfl.nu/gqs4
  Replies (1) Good night (625) Bad night (320)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.

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  (334): As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream. http://tfl.nu/b74h
  Replies (3) Good night (764) Bad night (325)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck

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  (770): Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck http://tfl.nu/dtrp
  Replies (4) Good night (478) Bad night (273)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore

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  (715): I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore http://tfl.nu/hhtw
  Replies (3) Good night (339) Bad night (478)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked

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  (716): Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked http://tfl.nu/c2o7
  Replies (3) Good night (664) Bad night (274)

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