if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
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He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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