This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Randomize