Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize