I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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