At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I intend to get homeless drunk
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
