I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
