her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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