the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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