That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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