you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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