I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
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