I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
