if you like me you must not know who I am
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
