so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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