We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
