The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize