I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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