so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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