lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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