Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
