just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
