I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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