i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
