Non-Jews are for practice
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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