idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Less talking, more tequila
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
