What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
