They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Randomize
