Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
