My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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