So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
