this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize