Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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