But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
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