ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Randomize
