Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
