i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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