sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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