Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
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Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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