Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize