Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Alive.
So much puke
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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