We're like a lot better than the average bears
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
