I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(