Those balls look pretty dangerous.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize