Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
