Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
