O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize
