I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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